Tiny Eden

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Who said 30 is not the new 20? ME!!!!

Here I am on my vacation. My looooooong awaited vacation. And what have I done? Hmmmm. Let's see. I have cleaned out my closet, dusted our bedroom, vacuumed, cleaned the 3 guest bedroom closets, organized the office, threw out a ton of old papers, organized the cabinet under the sink in the master bath, gone to work, cooked, gone grocery shopping....well, you get the point. Where in there has relaxation fit in? No where!!!! I think I might just be allergic to relaxation. I can't sleep at nite because I am too worried that I did not clean the base boards behind the bed well enough. As for exercise, I figure that the 20 trips that I am taking up and down the stairs is substitute enough for actual exercise. The sad part is that I need about another 3 weeks vacation to finish all the stuff that I still need to get done along with an additional 2 weeks vacation to recover from the additional 3 weeks vacation and the 17 days vacation that I originally had! And, usually, people need a vacation to recover from their vacation. This could be an endless process!

As I drove home from school on my last day, I actually cried. I was relieved, tired, anxious, and frankly, had no clue what the heck I was going to do with myself now that my semester was complete. I had gone from 120 mph to ZERO in the 3 seconds that it took me to hit complete and get my computerized test score. I had nothing to worry about. I did not have a test the next day, a care plan, drug sheets, online quizzes, or discussion questions. 17 days is the most I had had off in a year. What a scary feeling! And I don't mean that in a sarcastic way.

Now that I only have a week left, I am not ready to go back to school. I am glad that I was accepted to the accelerated summer program because I don't think I would be able to go back to school after having off the entire summer. I think I would have school-itis when the 18th rolled around. But this is it. The start of my last semester. I am almost done. December 14th, I will be graduating (fingers crossed!). The thought of caring for patients all by myself without an instructor breathing down my neck is causing me to completely panic. If I am not wide awake thinking about the base boards, I am wide awake thinking about taking care of patients. This whole chapter in my life is very overwhelming.

I wish I had more exciting stuff to write about my vacation. But I don't. The banana and Nutella crepes that I made for breakfast this past Sunday morning is about the wildest I have gotten. I would like to meet the people who said their 30's were the best years of their lives. So far, mine have proved to be rather dreadful/boring. And actually rather depressing. When you start to hear music that was popular when you were in school on a classic rock station, that is when you know you are getting old. Maybe when I am done with school and I start planning our wedding, it will get a little bit more exciting!

"So what are you reading?" "I am studying for one of my nursing classes." "Oh, so you are not smart enough to be a doctor. My daughter is in med school. She is going to be a doctor." "That's nice. I am smart enough. Nurses are just doctors with a personality and bed-side manner."
-Actual conversation between myself and a lovely meat head at Gold's Gym.*
*Please note, I was just defending myself and I know doctors have both personality and bed-side manner. Especially those named Kathleen Walsh who I love with all of my heart!!!!!