Tiny Eden

Tuesday, December 18, 2012

"Dana has cancer."  Those were the 3 words that my mother said to me on November 9th that made my heart beat so loud in my chest that I could no longer hear what she was saying.  I felt as though the wind had been knocked out of me and the room was getting smaller and smaller.  The shock was so great that I could not even cry and I could see Sam's mouth moving asking me what was wrong, but I couldn't hear a word he was saying.  All I could hear was my heart pounding in my ears. 

While my mother was on the phone with me, the doctor was telling my groggy sister the same news.  It made my heart hurt.  This was a feeling that I had felt only one other time and it was when my mother told me that my Grams had passed away.  This was a feeling that I hoped that I would never feel again, but less than 4 years later, I was feeling it again.  She was having surgery that day and something didn't look right.  What was supposed to be a short procedure ended up taking hours. 

They gave Dana a preliminary stage of 1B cervical cancer.  I did exactly what I told my mother and sister not to do.  Shortly after hanging up with my mother, I started to search on the internet and find out what her treatment options are and what her prognosis would be.  The doctor was very hopeful that it was caught very early on.  I flew to NY so I could be with Dana and my family while we tried to process all of this as we were all unsure about what the next road would lead us.

After we had all "accepted" the fact that Dana had cancer, she had to have a PET scan.  It did not reveal what we wanted it to.  It seems as though the cancer has spread to some lymph nodes.  Again, this was news that made me feel as though I had just been hit over the head with a baseball bat.  This changes her staging and her treatment.  Now we are not exactly sure what we are facing.  My faith is rocked, I am angry, frustrated, wondering why we have been handed something else to deal with. My heart is aching all over again and the stress and waiting is killing me.  Dana seems to be handling all of this a whole lot better than I am!  She will have surgery again in January which will give us the answers we need and to find out what treatment she will be getting to fight this.  Dana is a fighter.  She is a red head and is filled with courage and strength to beat this. 

So there it is.  I said it.  My sister has cancer. And it sucks.  Big time.

Dana is just like Martha Stewart, although not as snooty, much prettier, much younger, and much better hair.  But cooking wise, you would not be able to tell them apart.  I know Dana would be very disappointed if I did not include some of my Pinterest projects, especially my big Pinterest FAIL!  So, I will write about weeks 26 and 27.  Now I know I said that I would get better about writing, but I was so angry last week, I did not want to blog.

Pinterest Project Week 26: Also known as my epic FAIL!  Here is the blog I got it from.  I am not really sure what went wrong here.  It could have been that the pineapples were old, that they should have been pineapple tidbits instead of chunks, or that I just don't like angel food cake!  The choice that I am leaning towards is the whole not liking angel food cake thing.  Another thing, I did not follow  the directions very well.  It said to use a 9x13 pan and I used a bundt pan.  When I mixed the pineapples into the mix, it frothed up the way it was supposed to, but the chunks just sank to the bottom of the bundt pan.  The pan was not big enough, either I don't think because it kind of baked over.  I let it bake for the proper amount of time, but it was still wiggly, so I cooked it for some additional time.  When I took it out, it smelled good.  I let it cool completely and then I took it out of the pan.  What a mess!  The chunks all sank to the bottom (which only reaffirmed the fact that I needed to use the tid-bits) so the top of the cake was stuck to the inside of the pan.  I tasted the little bit that I was able to salvage and that was when I realized that I had never had angel food cake before.  I am sure that if you like angel food cake and follow the instructions, you will enjoy this cake.

Week 27 was a success!  This is something that I whipped up today because I was not feeling well and my co-worker, Mandy, was nice enough to work for me today so I didn't have to go in.  My throat has been on fire and I have a ton of post nasal drip.  My throat is froggy and my voice is almost completely gone.  I have been eating a ton of soup and for lunch, I thought if I had one more spoonful of soup, I would hurt someone!  So, I made some homemade mac and cheese in the microwave.  The recipe can be found at this great blog here!  I used some mini farfalle pasta and of course extra cheese.  The water in the mug will bubble over, but this is not a bad thing because when I wiped it up, it cleaned the microwave really well.  I can see lots of tasty opportunities with this.  Think bacon and all different types of cheeses!  Yum, yum, yummy!!!!!

With only a week away from Christmas, I hope everyone has a wonderful week of preparing and enjoying time with your families.  Thankfully, I have off Christmas day, but will be working on Christmas Eve.  Better to be working than to be a patient in the hospital, though!

"One of the most glorious messes in the world is the mess created in the living room on Christmas day. Don't clean it up too quickly." ~Andy Rooney

"Isn't it funny that at Christmas something in you gets so lonely for - I don't know what exactly, but it's something that you don't mind so much not having at other times." ~Kate L. Bosher

"Great little One! whose all-embracing birth
Lifts Earth to Heaven, stoops Heaven to Earth."  ~Richard Crashaw

Christmas is a time when you get homesick - even when you're home. ~Carol Nelson

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